I have indulged in adult beverages during my adult life. There have been times when I have had a bit too much to drink. I can honestly say that I've never had so much alcohol in my system that I was accused of wandering around naked in the house of someone who does not know me. The people who know me, realize it is a possibility. They are very responsible people who know how to cut me off before I reach the point where walking around their house naked seems like a good idea. I'm sure they realize the horror of such an experience would haunt them for the rest of their lives. A man in Connecticut did not have such friends. He was not cut off before he reached the level of alcohol consumption when walking around naked in a person's home seemed like a good idea. This individual was found wandering around the home of people who did not know him after he crashed his vehicle in their yard. He was not wearing any clothes. This really happened.
Below are some excerpts from the story with my valuable insights in italics.
A family in Connecticut had an unusual guest on Saturday after a man crashed his SUV into their yard and then walked around their house naked.
The Newtown Police Department told FOX61 they were dispatched to the home after residents said a naked man they did not know was wandering around their home.
The residents were out shopping in the morning and returned home to find 35-year-old Joseph Achenbach of Watertown inside.
I can only imagine what type of bizarre conversation took place upon the discovery of an unknown naked man wandering around their home.
“Oh, Emma, did you order a naked man? There is one wondering around our home.”
“I don't think so, let me check my receipts, I'm so very forgetful.”
Emma takes out her Smartphone and looks at her shopping receipts.
“I don't see a naked man on any of my recent purchases. Could you have ordered a naked man?”
“I'm sure I didn't. This man appears to be naked and drunk. I may order a drunk man or a naked man but never one who is both drunk and naked.”
“It certainly wasn't me.”
“What should we do?”
“I say we call the police.”
“Will they be showing up naked?”
“Not those police, the real police.”
“Oh.”
During the investigation, officers determined that Achenbach had crashed his Ford Escape into the backyard of the residents' home and wandered into the house through an unlocked sliding glass door.
“Ma'am, it appears the naked man crashed his vehicle into your backyard.”
I have no doubt that being drunk and naked would significantly impair your driving. If you were to spill a hot beverage or reach across to the passenger seat to get to the glove box things could get quite uncomfortable. Especially, if you are a messy person with mountain climbing equipment laying carelessly all over your vehicle. Don't worry, I won't bring my husband into this, but he is a messy mountain climber who should never drive naked.”
“Thank you, ma'am, but that is too much information.”
Police said that the 35-year-old's clothes could not be found at the scene, and it is believed that he was naked when he crashed the car, FOX61 reported.
(Sarcasm Alert)
That is something. I wonder if he was part of the Drunk and Naked Vehicle Drivers of America (DNVDA)? He could have been participating in one of the naked drunk drives they hold during their meetings.
I can only imagine the mental process of this guy.
“I've got to get to a friend's house. I'm naked and I'm drunk. Not a problem. I'll just hop into my Ford Escape and be there in a minute. What could go wrong?”
Police believe that alcohol and drugs played a role in the suspect's behavior.
Achenbach has been charged with criminal trespassing, reckless endangerment, disorderly conduct and driving while intoxicated. He's being held on $5,000 bond and will appear in court Monday.
You know, I have no crime scene investigative experience, but I would have suspected drugs and alcohol playing a part in this guy's behavior. If not, he has some real mental issues.
“What are your hobbies?”
“I like to watch movies and go bowling. How about you?”
“I like to get drunk, take off all my clothes and crash my vehicle into the home's of complete strangers and then walk around their house naked.”
“Wow, you make movies and bowling seem so boring.”
Here is a link to the story.
https://www.foxnews.com/us/connecticut-man-crashes-car-into-strangers-yard-wanders-in-naked-police-say
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