I'll admit that I do like having Spam now and then. When camping it's good to cook over an open flame. There have been times in the mornings when I've cooked it up with eggs and toast. I like Spam, but it's not my identity. That's not the case for a person in Liverpool, England, who changed his middle name to 'I love Spam.' This makes no sense to me. Changing your name to 'I love chocolate' or 'I love beer' makes a bit more sense, but not much more.
Below are excerpts from a news article in bold. My valuable insights are in italics.
The UK's biggest Spam fan is such a fan of the canned meat that he changed his middle name to 'I love Spam'.
Madcap Mark Benson, 41, from Halewood, Liverpool, cannot get enough of the pork product and tucks into the meat for breakfast every day. The dad-of-two also cooks recipes using the meat up to four times-a-week and has an extensive collection of memorabilia, including a Spam can suit and Spam flip flops.
Yeah, I can only imagine there may be people many people waiting in line to visit this guy. What would a conversation be like with him?
“I think my grandmother may have terminal cancer.”
“Why don't you give her some Spam. It may just be the cure. Forget cancer drugs, your grandmother just needs to eat a bit more Spam.”
I can almost imagine his children.
“Dad, I don't want you wearing your Spam can suit, and Spam flip flops when you answer the door. The last boy who came here for a date ran away, and I never heard from him again.”
“It may not be good for your dating life, but its a great thing when salesmen come knocking. They never stay around long enough to tell me what they're trying to sell. Unfortunately, utility workers also run away. I guess you can't have everything.”
But care support worker Mark took his devotion one step further in February last year when he formally made his middle name 'I Love Spam'.
And the Spam fanatic admits that he has been hooked on the meat since he was a two-year-old.
Can you imagine the judge ruling on this name change?
“Yes, your legal name is now officially changed to 'I Love Spam.” I understand you have a cousin named, 'I enjoy Spam,' and an uncle named 'I tolerate Spam.'
“We don't talk about the black sheep of the family. His middle name change was kind of crazy.”
“What was it?”
“His name is 'I don't like Spam.' We don't like to talk about him. Nobody knows what happened.”
“Oh.”
Mark's obsession with Spam began after his grandfather Thomas Farrell served in theSecond World War and was served the meat, which was first released in the USA in 1937, as rations. The veteran went on to serve in the United States after the war and discovered a further 18 varieties across the Atlantic before returning back to the UK.
(Sarcasm alert) Now isn't this a touching story? A grandfather doesn't bother to tell little Mark about how World War II impacted his family. He tell his young grandson stories about eating Spam. Not only does his grandson not learn about defeating the Nazi war machine, he learns about how his grandfather discovered 18 varieties of Spam in the United States before returning to England. Who cares about the course of world history unless it involves Spam?
A Spam spokesperson said: "As you can imagine Spam Brand has many fans across the world, but Mark really stands out when it comes to going that extra mile.
"His enthusiasm for the great taste of Spam products as well as his important family history is wonderful to hear.
I'm sure this is what they tell reporters. Those Spam spokespeople want to appear nice to the world. I bet behind closed doors they're holding their stomachs laughing and saying “This idiot changed his middle name to 'I Love Spam.' You know it is crazy people who want to get mentioned in the media who are better than paying for advertising. Yeah, this is almost as good as the Spam carving contest held in Oklahoma (There actually is a Spam carving contest in Oklahoma).
"We can't wait to welcome Mark along as a true Spambassador and let more local people know about what Spam Can really do."
Yeah, clog your veins, give you heart disease just for starters. I can only imagine Mark being announced when he enters a formal ball with international representatives from around the world.
“Announcing Spambassador Mark, I love Spam.”
People clap but are surprised. They've probably never seen a man wearing a Spam can suit, and Spam flip flops at such a formal occasion. Mark will probably then go around the room meeting people and sharing stories about how his father discovered 18 varieties of Spam in the United States during World War II.
Story About Name Change To 'I Love Spam.'
http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/food-fan-changes-middle-name-7418372
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