I can remember all the pets we had when I was growing up. Our family had the obligatory dog and cat and at one time or another we also provided a home for a gerbil and goldfish. We loved them, took care of them and felt we had given them some pretty good lives. By the standards of today’s pet owners we would’ve been considered neglectful, cruel and heartless ogres.
One of the reasons people may consider us to have been so awful is that we never gave our dog a birthday party. When a relative of mine told me she was going to willingly pay hard-earned money to a pet store which would provide a birthday party for her dog I didn’t take it serious.
“You’re going to have a birthday party for your dog? Are you going to make a funny video and send it to one of those network shows?”
“No, I’m very serious about this. I took my dog Chantal to another dog’s birthday party a few weeks ago.”
“What kind of games do they play at a dog birthday party? Sniff the tail on the donkey? How about hump, hump goose?”
She just rolled her eyes, sighed and left the room. I realized later she was probably offended because she was actually serious. A friend enlightened me about the many things people can do for their pets these days. I had no idea how many individuals there are with lots of money and plenty of free time.
When we got our dog we bought him a food dish, water dish, took him to the vet for a few shots, got him his dog license and we were all set. He never asked about going to a birthday party. This canine was very busy doing dog things like barking, sniffing, marking his territory and sleeping. Maybe the dogs of today have too much time on their paws and need to attend classes at a local university on the finer points of being just a dog. If my dog were alive today he would’ve been a great teacher.
There were times when my dog got sick and we took him to the vet. The vet would give him a shot or maybe pills our dog would refuse to take. He always seemed pretty healthy. The pets of today don’t need just a vet for their healthcare. They get to visit places that provide holistic pet care.
At a holistic pet clinic pets can get acupuncture, spinal adjustments as well as myofacial therapy and allergy treatments. I wonder if acupuncture could actually stop our cat from hairballing in the middle of the night on my desk chair. Spinal adjustments for a dog I’m sure are very important because if a dog is going to clean itself it should be able to do such a thing free from pain.
If the pet of today still isn’t happy after their holistic treatment another group of professionals are willing to step up and offer their services. They call themselves animal psychologists. I guess if your cat isn’t scratching up your furniture like it did at one time, your dog has lost its desire to mate with your leg or your hamster just isn’t stuffing things in its mouth it just might be the perfect time to get your pet a few sessions with your local animal therapist.
“Chantel tell me about learning to mark your territory when you were a puppy. Were your owners sensitive to your desire to chew on everything of value in their home?"
"Woof, Woof, pant, pant, woof."
"I sense your pain. This will take many more visits at my high hourly rate to fix all of those traumatic experiences you've had during your short but tragic life."
"Woof, bark, bark, woof, pant, bark."
"Don't worry; I'm sure we can work around your massage times as well as your birthday parties and myofacial treatments."
"Woof."
"Glad you're feeling better already."
I don’t know what will be created next to provide pet owners with a new and innovative way to spend their money. Will it be a robot that takes your dog for a walk and gives it water while providing music for it to scratch itself by? How about a movie for your cat that describes the dangers of experimenting with excessive use of catnip? Maybe we’ll finally have officially elected official to represent the pet populations in government.
“I plan to vote for Robbie the Rabbit to represent me. He’s a true family man having 128 off spring just this week.”
I understand being good to your pet. I confess to developing an emotional attachment to the pets we’ve had over the years but I’ve never lost sight of the fact they were animals.
No birthday party can change the fact that a dog is a dog. Myofacial treatments for a cat make about as much sense as a litter box for your grandmother. All the holistic pet care and pet therapists in the world will not change the fact that your pet is an animal. An animal you treat well, have an emotion bond with and take care of until its last days on this earth.
Pet owners who over indulge their pets by spending more on them than the total annual earnings of some populations of some third world countries have serious needs. The type of needs that aren’t going to be satisfied by having a pet but will require a deep and honest look inside to discover the answer.
Until that happens I guess we’ll continue to see doggy fashion shows, flushing kitty litter boxes and travel packages that include pet accommodations. I will continue to not envy some people’s luck but be amazed at the fortunate circumstances of some pets.
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