Ned Nefer and his wife make a touching couple as they travel on their vacation in upstate New York. People are often amazed when they see the couple. Nefer’s wife Teagan is unable to walk so Ned willingly pushes her around in a wheelchair. Unfortunately, Teagan hasn’t been able to walk since she was made. I would say born but that wouldn’t apply since she is actually a mannequin. I stand corrected because she’s actually the head of a mannequin that Ned found in the 1980s and a body he attached to it. Talk about finding someone who was made just for you. Wow!
I hope the courts are not going to soon be filled with people claiming it is social justice for people to be married to the mannequin of their choice. In today's society, it is possible.
According to Ned Nefer, he and Teagan were married on Halloween night in 1986. Since Ned is 38-years-old that means he was all of 13 at the time.
I can only imagine what would take place during that wedding ceremony.
“Do you teenage boy take this mannequin to love, not use as firewood, regularly apply waterproofing and polish regularly until the day you die?”
“I sure do.”
“Do you mannequin take this teenage boy to love, not give splinters, not grow moldy or attract termites until the day you are turned into mulch?”
“I do.”
“That sounded strangely like Ned doing a female voice but I’ll take it. I now pronounce you mannequin and one disturbed young boy.”
(I did resist the temptation to say this was “sappy”)
According to the Watertown Daily Times, Ned claims he and Teagan really love the outdoors. Maybe while traveling in the forest Teagan is able to visit with old relatives she’s not seen for a long time, such as cousin Maple or uncle Pine. I’m sure Aunt Spruce is always glad to see the couple. I’ll bet Ned enjoys the chance to look at old family photographs of Teagan when she was just a sapling.
I wonder if Ted’s friends are very accepting of his wife.
“Dude I hate to say this but your wife is a mannequin.”
“So? What are you? A mannequinaphobe?”
“Don’t you want a real wife?”
“Hey, my wife never yells at me, never complains when I go out with my friends or says anything bad about my family. She’s quiet when I watch sports and doesn’t complain when I go to porn sites on the web. How many guys you know have a wife like that?”
“Wow, does she have a sister?”
For some reason in this relationship, Ned does all the talking. He tells people his wife’s full name is Teagan Yvonne Savannah Thjodhild-Nefer. She has a father who was Icelandic and her mother was Sudanese. According to Ned, Teagan lived in Haiti and Sudan before moving to the United States.
“Look at my parents on that ship.”
“Where?”
“See all of the paneling on the outside?”
“Yeah.”
“That’s them.”
Ned tells people this is a special vacation because they’re visiting all the places in New York they’d previously visited together. He likes to take pictures with a disposable camera and has filled three photo albums. His photographic preference is of the town and village signs he goes past as well as rock formations and cemeteries. Ned claims he does like taking pictures of nature in general. Almost makes you wonder if Ansel Adams ever had a mannequin somewhere in his life.
It’s painfully obvious this guy has problems. I don’t know what’s more disturbed; Ned Neffer pushing his mannequin wife around New York in a wheelchair or people calling police after seeing them.
“Nine One One, what’s your emergency?”
“There’s a man pushing a mannequin around in a wheelchair taking pictures.”
“Is he bothering you?”
“No.”
“Is he causing any problems?”
“No.”
“Then why are you calling?”
“That mannequin looks like my ex-wife and she owes me money.”
“Goodbye.”
Jefferson County Sherriff John P. Burns has responded to calls about the couple. According to Sheriff Burns, Ned has never been taken into custody because he has never been a threat. Officer Burns did take the time to check out Nefer’s background and said that “Nefer” is a shortened version of his actual last name, but he does have a valid state Department of Motor Vehicles identification card, but not a driver’s license. For some reason knowing that makes me feel better about driving in upstate New York.
It seems that when people meet Ned and Teagan they like the couple. People have even set up a Facebook fan page for them. Erin LeClair and her fiancé Steve Kalwarovski count the couple as their friends. Erin feels Ned is actually eccentric and is extremely intelligent. The two are considering inviting Ned and Teagan to their wedding. I can only imagine what type of wedding present they’ll receive from this couple.
I don’t know how a guy has the finances and time to push his mannequin wife around upstate New York in a wheelchair, but I guess it’s none of my business. Ned seems to live in a world most of us don’t understand. He’s different and maybe if we can accept him the way he is we can begin to accept ourselves. According to Steve Kalwarovski, Ned’s favorite musical bands are Godsmack and Disturbed. Doesn’t that say it all?
Here is a link to the article.
Here is a funny video from It is a Glorious Day.
It is called: Buy My Book Because I need the money By Leroy Jo Jo Jones
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