In the United Kingdom, you can ride on a double-decker bus and now you can ride on a poop-powered bus. This is a real form of mass transportation in England. I think it's a great idea. The morning commute will become an entirely new experience.
“I hope the bus gets here soon. I have to use the bathroom.”
“Why don't you just use the bathroom in the bagel shop behind us?”
“The driver depends on me pinching a loaf to give the bus enough power to finish the route.”
“Oh.”
This is an actual story. Below are excerpts of the story in bold and my valuable insights is in italics.
Poop-powered bus hits British roads
The U.K.’s first poop-powered bus hit the road this week, ferrying fare-paying passengers around parts of south-west England.
“What stinks? Is that a garbage truck?”
“No, that's the poop-powered bus that will be taking us to work.”
“Oh.”
But banish from your mind the image of a vehicle kitted out with toilets for seats, with a bus-load of passengers happily knocking one out to get the thing to the next stop. The reality is a little different.
It probably isn't as interesting either. Can you imagine people yelling about being out of toilet paper and a roll being passed from person to person until the roll reaches its designated recipient? What if your poop provided a lot of power? Would you get a preferred poop bus rider card? This bus would need to have a lot of reading material and industrial strength room fresheners.
This one runs solely on biomethane gas generated from human sewage and food waste. The 40-seat ‘Bio-Bus’ – to give it its official name – can travel up to 184 miles on a single tank of the gas, which is generated via a treatment process known as ‘anaerobic digestion.’
Human sewage and food waste? Good to know there's a difference. Let's see, 184 miles on a single tank of gas? I bet they would get better mileage if they picked up people leaving Mexican or Indian restaurants. Anaerobic digestion seems like something required after Thanksgiving dinner.
Gas production has proved so successful that some of it is also being injected into the national grid by a recently constructed state-of-the-art facility.
The green energy initiative, which is the work of Wessex Water and treatment-plant operator GENeco is able to produce 17 million cubic meters of biomethane a year, “equivalent of meeting the power needs of 8,500 homes,” according to Wessex Water.
‘The poo bus’
I think that 17 million cubic meters of biomethane in a single year is impressive. I bet that I and some of the guys I served with in the military did this with beer and baked beans at a picnic one year. If 17 million cubic meters of biomethane can power 8,500 homes, we could've met the power needs of a few medium-sized states. There are benefits to having beer and baked beans outside in open areas. It creates a significant decline in the surrounding insect population.
Wessex Water’s vehicle, affectionately known as “the poo bus,” produces fewer, ahem, ‘emissions’ than regular diesel engines, and therefore helps to improve air quality in urban areas. Speaking of air quality, smelly impurities are removed from the gas to ensure the bus doesn’t kick up a stink among those living along its route.
Wow, talk about pun intensive. Fewer emissions than a diesel engine? Is this a result of putting Beano into the engine? Removing smelly impurities is a good thing. I wonder if this is a result of adding industrial strength rose water to the engine?
The special bus is being used to transport around 10,000 passengers a month between Bristol airport and the historic city of Bath 20 miles away. The initiative comes after Bristol was crowned the European Green Capital after impressing judges with its consistently high environmental standards.
They had to make it go to Bath, didn't they?
Can you imagine the advertising tag lines for this bus line?
“Poop bus lines. We gladly take people's S**t!”
“Poop bus lines. You benefit from us being full of crap!”
“Poop bus lines. Don't worry about your morning bathroom business. Save it for the bus.”
“Poop bus lines. Before you flush...think of us.”
“Poop bus lines. When you regularly go...so do we.”
I'll stop, but I could easily go on.
The U.K.’s first poop-powered bus reminds us of the poop-powered motorcycle which landed on Japanese roads a couple of years back as part of a green initiative run by toilet-maker Toto.
This is real. A manufacturer of toilets made a poop powered motorcycle.
Poop-powered motorcycle Story
“What's that roll of toilet paper doing near your gas tank?”
“Don't ask.”
“What kind of gas do you put in your motorcycle?”
“Jalapeno peppers and cheap beer."
“Huh?”
I suppose I can handle a poop-powered bus and motorcycle. This technology may be a great thing to use with airline travel. It can get pretty scary up there!
Poop Powered Bus Story
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Here is a funny video from
It is a Glorious Day.
It is called: The Poo Bus
Is Real
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